Tag Archives: Trashland A Go-Go

Interview with The How The Why 

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I met a lot of people when I attended AWP to represent Ladybox Books and one of them invited me to be a guest on their podcast. 

Click HERE to listen to it and hear me talk about Ladybox Books, publishing, and my gross overuse of the word “um.” 

Six Days, Eighteen Days, ALL the Days.

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October 22nd  was the 1 year anniversary of the publication of my first novella, Trashland A Go-Go.  That’s pretty damn exciting. WHAT a year it’s been!
It’s been full of excitement and, more recently, some sadness. But as my year long trial with the New Bizarro Author Series comes to a close, I can’t help but be excited.

In 18 days I will be reunited with my fellow NBASers at the 5th annual BizarroCon and we will find out what the next year holds for us. THAT is even more exciting! I’m keeping all of my appendages crossed in anticipation.

We entered into this series, all vying for a contract with Eraserhead Press and the process has been incredible. I got to have my first novella published, which seems to have been pretty well received. I got to read multiple reviews of my work and see what other people drew from my words, which was a REALLY interesting experience.  I gained many friends and, what I feel, is a second family.

Although the eight NBAS authors are all technically competing for contracts, there was virtually ZERO rivalry. We swapped sources, reviews, interviews and were generally a support system for each other over the course of the year. As corny as it may sound, the connection that formed between us was undeniable. I hope it is this way for all the previous NBAS authors, as well as those to come.

There are only SIX days left to purchase our books to have them count toward our sales goals. Help out some aspiring authors and pick up a few new books today! Click HERE to purchase any/all of the 2011 New Bizarro Author Series releases. I’d love for all of us to succeed.
If the thought of making EIGHT dreams come true isn’t enticing enough for you, all NBAS 2011 releases are available under the 4 for the price of 3 deal! Cha-CHING!

Grimbolina in Stripperland: A Justin Grimbol Adventure

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While finishing up my morning correspondence (or…you know, fucking off on facebook) I received a message from my friend and NBAS author Justin Grimbol, who I have vowed to refer to as “Grimbolina” because it makes him sound like a fuzzy pixie, that said
“I had a wacky strip club adventure and I thought of your book.When I went to bed I was like, ‘Man, I hope I don’t wake up in a crazy trash world.’

If Grimbolina thought is was wacky, then I REALLY needed to know what happened.

“It was a fun night. I went with my buddies. Each one of us met a stripper that seemed designed for us. I met a metal head that helps set up horror conventions. My hippy friend met a stripper that wanted to be an organic farmer. My other buddy, met a a girl that loved hot pockets. I gave metal head chick a dollar when she was dancing and she started basically molesting me on stage, it was magical. My hippy friend started telling his hippy stripper about Maine and how beautiful it was and then she started to cry. That was strange.

I spent most of the night nerding out about horror movies with metal head girl. The experience was downright wholesome. The next morning we called our girlfriends.

Each had a different reaction. Hippy friend’s girl just thought it was cool. She seemed proud of my buddy. My girlfriend is used to me going to strip clubs. Ben’s girl was like ‘Fuck you! You better buy me so many presents!’
I also met this weird chubby couple that lived in the woods behind the strip club. They were nice. ”

It was brought to my attention that Mr. Grimbol has TONS of fantastic strip club stories:
“There was the time i spent $700 in strip clubs in Key West. The fat guy I saw cum in his pants in NY, the time my fiance and I got kicked out of strip club in Oregon; Heather got up on stage and dudes started throwing money at her. She got really sad when we got kicked out. I can’t believe I never told you any of these stories.”

But never fear! He will! And they will be shared with you! Check back here for more adventures with Grimbolina!
If you can’t wait until then, check out his blog Butt Shark University!

New From Skurvy Ink: Trashland A Go-Go T-shirts!

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You know you wanna wear me

Now I’m like a fucking rock band! I have t-shirts!

Design by Justin T Coons

Get your TRASHLAND A GO-GO t-shirts at Skurvy Ink.com !

Skurvy Ink boasts tons fantastic bizarro shirts like Andrew Goldfarb, Kevin Shamel , Eraserhead and Swallowdown Press and many more!
Get your Bizarro gear today!

And if you haven’t gotten your copy of Trashland A Go-Go, never fear! The link for purchase is HERE!

Wish I’d Thought Of It First: Leave it to Seizure

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I’m a sick bastard.
I don’t imagine that is a secret to anyone. I find amusement in some strange places.
One of them is the show 1,000 Ways To Die on the, generally geared towards men, television network “Spike”. It was suggested to me by Netflix, and like so many things they suggest to me, I loved it.

It’s like they know me.

The big draw to this show for me is the camp. All of the deaths featured are “inspired by actual events.”

The show is graphic in the way a B-movie is graphic. Each dramatization features tons of too-red blood, fake organs exposed and exploding, and campy, over the top, bad acting. The kind of shit I eat for breakfast.
They tend to set up each story by making the soon-to-be-deceased seem like a complete sleaze bag. Which I assume is to get the average viewer to think of them less like a person and more like a cartoon villain who has finally gotten their comeuppance. A damn fine strategy if the success of your program depends on being able to mock the dead.

I tore through the first season. It actually helped me figure out how to deal with a character in Trashland A Go-Go.

While watching a good chunk of the marathon featured on television yesterday evening, I came across a gem. The death of a stripper that I kicked myself for not thinking of on my own.

Gold.

Not that I regret the way I killed Coco Darling. I’ll stand by that. But goddamn. This would have been a fine scene as well.
You’ve served me well, 1,000 Ways To Die. I tip my hat to your genius.

Basking and Gushing

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I returned from BizarroCon 2011 last night and fell into bed, exhausted and on a high that only BizarroCon can provide. It’s so fucking refreshing. I am absolutely smitten with each and every person who attended and honored to be a part of such a diverse, interesting, creative and warm group of people.
I was basically heartbroken when it was time to come home. 

I slacked off on my Bizarro Central duties something fierce while I was away. I was busy falling in love with some of the most magnificent fucking people I have ever be lucky enough to meet. Fortunately, Sam Reeve (another editor at Bizarro Central) had the presence of mind to make a post. And a DAMN fine post it is. Check out her 10 Personal Highlights of BizarroCon to see what you missed. Like Michael A. Rose being my favorite person in the universe by agreeing to strip and give David Barbee a lapdance as the finale to my first public reading ever, Jeremy Robert Johnson getting a mess of duck heads dropped in his lap, Cody Goodfellow and Nick Gucker performing a rendition of my all time favorite childeren’s book The Giving Tree, entitled :”The Greedy Tree“, and SO much more.
Thursday evening 6 of the 8 New Bizarro Authors were taken away to be presented with our books. Where I tried not to weep like a wee child once it was in my hand. Harder still once I opened it and saw the surprise personalized intro from Kevin Shamel.

After much anticipation and attempting to stuff some accidentally released cats back into their respective bags- here it is, in all it’s glory! And it’s ready to come live a cozy little life on your bookshelf, night stand, or backpack.

Wherever you keep your books, Trashland A Go-Go wants to be there!

I am so excited to officially announce this! I know that we, the 2011 NBAS, got a little antsy and there has been some mild promotion before now. But, I wanted to wait until the launch/BizarroCon to make my official announcement.

As a member of the New Bizarro Author Series we have a sales quota to fulfill. Our reward? Being able to write MORE books! So, if you would like for me to be able to write more books for Eraserhead Press, then purchase you must!

“Alice in Wonderland, with garbage and a dead stripper!
Coco takes off her clothes for a living, until some nasty little bitch kills her while she’s dancing. Thrown in the dumpster by her sleazebag boss, Coco awakens in a land of trash. With her new friend, Rudy (a dying fly), and her knight in garbage armor, the undead dancer tries to find her way home. But first she must escape from the evil Queen of this trashscape: a jealous and insane Ruler of Refuse who has an intense fear of flies. With hints of The Matrix and The Whiz, this heady trip will satisfy your cravings for twisted fairy tales, rotting garbage, and charming weirdos.
Long live the Queen!”

I was also fortunate enough to get my first review on Amazon! By some one I don’t already know! How exciting is that?! So exciting that I took a screen shot! :

Trashland A Go-Go (as well as the rest of this years NBAS titles) is available now! In both Kindle and paperback editions! And eligible for the fantastic 4 books for the price of 3 deal! There is no reason to not pick up all eight!

But if you want to just buy 4 copies of my book, I won’t mind that either. It’ll make a great stocking stuffer.

GIGANTICCRUSHINGTHANKS to Kevin Shamel for working with me beginning to end on this book, and even before. Because without him it wouldn’t even have made it to the original 5,000 words that waited impatiently in my notebook after last year’s BizarroCon.
I will forever sing his praises and consider myself so much more fortunate than I can even attempt to fathom, for having an editor than genuinely cares not only about my work, but about me.

The entire experience has been surreal. I’m on cloud 12,995.

Six years ago my brother Kevin Parks handed me a copy of Carlton Mellick III ‘s Teeth and Tongue Landscape and I became a fan of Bizarro.
Thursday November 17th 2011 Kevin Shamel, Rose O’Keefe, and Kevin L. Donihe presented me with a copy of my first book as a Bizarro author. I never in a million years thought it would happen. But I am elated that it did and am honored to be a part of this wonderful community and to have the support of so many magnificent people and to support them and all they do in return.

xo Constance Ann

More Strippers To Look Forward To: Strippers vs Werewolves!

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WHAT?! Strippers vs Werewolves?!
These people are fucking geniuses! Who doesn’t love hot girls covered in blood?  It’s sort of what slasher films are built on. Gore, boobs, more gore, some full frontal, and MORE GORE!
Now, you are going to say to yourself, “Strippers vs Werewolves sounds pretty awesome. But I still need MORE! Make this MORE awesome!”
And a little voice should pop up here and tell you to stop being so fucking selfish. Werewolves, and scheming strippers ought to be enough for you! But fine! You want more!? We’ll throw in Bill Murray and Robert Englund!
What the WHAT!?
And how about a super fucking sweet trailer set to Duran Duran’s “Hungry Like the Wolf”?

I might be more excited for this movie (due out this winter!) than I am for Trashland A Go-Go!

. . . okay, not really.
Trashland A Go-Go launches OFFICIALLY this weekend at BizarroCon 2011.
Thanks to everyone who has already purchased a copy! I’ll post links, cover arts and a page listing all the NBAS authors with links to their books, once it’s all official/ post-Con.

Meanwhile, here’s a neat article by someone who got to spend a day on the set of Strippers vs Werewolves. Lucky bastard.

xo Constance Ann